Feedback

Consistent font - the opening font for the credits do not fit the genre and the title. I will also have to change the font on the poster to make it consistent throughout the production

Change the fast zoom at the beggining

Look at actual credits no camera/director

Using the same or similar sound to create a difference between the flashbacks and the real world.

Re-film the ending to finish/connect the narrative

The footage on the beach is realistic links to Loach and Arnold in its observation style.

The flashback 'light' is too disconcerting and dark.

Draft 6

The latest draft of the footage shot. The final flashback scene (basketball scene) has been added to the end of the short. The main issue with doing this is that where it is placed seems forced and does not fit well into the flow of the film. So the basketball flashback will have to be placed more carefully into the scene.
To change the jilting feeling of the basketball scene it could be cut into the final cross cutting scene between the main character and the older brother walking. The footage at the end of the flashback (when he gets it through the hoop) could cut to the older brother stepping off the pavement.
There are some other minor editing flaws.
Also the relationship between the main character and his brother when they are older is very vague and there is no connection between them. This will have to be changed, the more obvious solution is to completely re film the ending and take out the older brother from the sequence. It can also be done by using both the younger versions of themselves and the older versions to create the connection between the characters.